Saturday 11 December 2010

Technology


Ha - fooled you about not blogging over the weekend!

We’ve been having a mobile phone re-evaluation within our household. Hay took the opportunity of digging out all her old phones, one of which was a very tiny Samsung from around the year 2000.

It would seem that prior to the advent of the touch-phone and imaging applications, the holy grail of mobile telephony was smallness, limited only by the size of the Mk I digit. Since then they have become inexorably larger to accommodate all manner of multimedia applications that rely on the Mk I eyeball. It won’t be long before we’re toting gigantic screens around with us. Having gnarled sausages for fingers, I have enormous problems with touch-screen technology.

What I’m looking forward to is a pair of varifocals that function as a total multimedia experience, complete with thought controls.

Talking of technology, No. 1 son has a school project on the Industrial Revolution. Never at a loss to include some modern reference, has he entitled his project “IR, The Rise of the Machines - Never Send a Human to do a Machine’s Job”.

Talking of being a Luddite – we visited a local hostelry the other evening (which shall be nameless) and neither of the two girls behind the bar were capable of using a waiters’ friend to extract the cork from a bottle of Malbec. The waiters’ friend is a device that even a child of 6 could master within 30 seconds – but not the girls behind the bar. Hay had to show them how to do it.


The Waitresses’ Confuser

If ever we were to have infinite data storage, how the hell would we be able to find the location of a virus? Infinity is a rather large place for a virus to hide. We’ll also need infinite processing speed – but even that won’t be a solution as ∞/∞ does not necessarily = 1, or so I am told.

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